日本英語検定協会の2020年度 第2回、英検1級一次試験エッセイ(Agree or disagree: Global overpopulation is a serious threat to the future of humankind)の解答例文
日本英語検定協会の2020年度 第2回、英検1級一次試験エッセイ(English Composition)の解答例文です。コーチNo.1が作文しました。ネイティブ講師の添削(てんさく)も受けております。
課題:Agree or disagree: Global overpopulation is a serious threat to the future of humankind
こちらはコーチNo.1の解答例文です。添削前です。
I firmly believe that global overpopulation is detrimental to the future generations. I will clarify my reasons for it.
Firstly with over 7 billion humans to feed, the world is running out of land for farming. Some argue the solution is to increase yields through the use of genetically engineered crops, but fears about the safety of such crops make this a partial solution at best. A more radical solution is vertical farming, where crops are grown indoors in urban high-rise structures. However, a large amount of artificial lighting will be required and demand would be pushed even higher by having to control temperatures and deliver water and fertilizer to higher floors.
Secondly, due to the growing population, excessive use of energy, fertilizer and pesticides are wreaking environmental havoc. Global warming which possibly results in the breakdown of ozone layer is becoming a serious threat to human beings with increasing CO2 emissions. A lot of species are disappearing from the earth because of the contaminated fresh water and deforestation.
Finally, overpopulation have led to the shortage of the world’s natural resources. It is difficult to discover some form of effective alternative energy to replace fossil fuels. Wind power, for example, is one contender for a sustainable form of energy, but the amount of space which the windmills require in order to provide sufficient energy for an entire town is far greater than the area of the town itself. In other words, forests and other natural environments would have to be decimated to install them, and that would be self-defeating.
All in all, based on the above mentioned reasons, I maintain that global over population is a serious threat to the future of mankind.
wordcounterでの単語数カウント結果:283 words 1,733 characters
こちらはネイティブ講師No.1の添削後です。
I firmly believe that global overpopulation is detrimental to future generations. I will clarify my reasons for this.
Firstly with over 7 billion to feed, the world is running out of land for farming. Some argue the solution is to increase yields through the use of genetically engineered crops, but fears about the safety of such crops make this a partial solution at best. A more radical solution is vertical farming, where crops are grown indoors in urban high-rise structures. However, a large amount of artificial lighting will be required and demand will be pushed even higher by having to control temperatures and deliver water and fertilizer to higher floors.
Secondly, due to the mushrooming population, excessive use of energy, fertilizer and pesticides is wreaking environmental havoc. Global warming which possibly results in the breakdown of the ozone layer is becoming a serious threat with increasing CO2 emissions. A lot of species are disappearing from the earth because of contaminated fresh water and deforestation.
Finally, overpopulation has led to the shortage of the world’s natural resources. It is difficult to imagine any form of effective alternative energy to replace fossil fuels. Wind power, for example, is one contender for a sustainable form of energy, but the amount of space which the windmills require in order to provide sufficient energy for an entire town is far greater than the area of the town itself. In other words, forests and other natural environments would have to be decimated to install them, and that would be self-defeating.
All in all, based on the above mentioned reasons, I maintain that global overpopulation is a serious threat to the future of mankind.
wordcounterでの単語数カウント結果:277 words 1,707 characters